Rover is Over

A few months ago now, as most people know, the firm that made Rover cars went bust. Various jokes went around, most of them quite funny in my opinion, and even some accusations were levelled at motoring journalists like Jeremy Clarkson who is supposed to have said how crap Rovers are for the last decade.

I should say that I am not a petrol-head, even a motoring enthusiast, or even a motorist really. I don't have a full licence, and am not likely to get one in the next five years, and have only had one driving lesson in my life from a dear friend Sophie who is training to become a vet (not the same Sophie from Blog 1, in case you were wondering). And as it goes, I am very happy with one horsepower -- on four legs -- thanks very much.

Despite this, I had my first experience of driving when I was 9, a month short of a full decade before I first rode a horse, in what would now look like a desperately out of date and rather silly Ford Escort. I got to drive around Brands hatch, do dome silly things, but not very well. I loved it. I had a fondness for cars during my childhood, collecting trump cards and all that as well as learning what they all were called from what they looked like. I remember being walked back from school by the neighbour who looked after us and challenging her to test me on what each car along the road was. I got them all right, except for some technicality on one, the Escort and Orion looked indistinguishable to me) Anyway, somewhere or other there is some connection with motorised transport. Perhaps it's a male thing, or a science thing (I am a scientist, in case you don't know) or an interest in how things work and doing better than what's been done before, or a mix, I don't know. One aspect of cars that frightens me though is the safety one. For some reason I don't feel unsafe when I am driven around, even when being driven by drivers of dubious technical ability -- the sort of ones who probably passed their driving tests 'morally' -- but the rational idea of doing it myself doesn't quite work some how: those adverts that say don't speed, look at what can happen etc etc all put me off enormously.

That thing about safety they did on Top Gear a few years ago, showing examples of 3, 4 and 5 star Euro nCap test crashes was sobering. Did you know in a 3 star car, a crash at 40mph is enough to bring the brake pedal forwards? If your foot is on it, you get a nasty leg injury. In another 3 star car they showed the joint between the windscreen pillar and the roof broke in a 40 mph crash. Any faster and what chance have you got?

However, driving that Escort was fun, as was driving my mum's rather lack-lustre automatic Nissan Micra in a car park (the old one, G reg, and she got very tense every time I went at more than 20mph), I even drove my Dad's VW Passat off-road (well for 3 feet in a straight line, and it was on a rather flat bit of grass, in a camping site) and that lesson in a Vauxhall. That last car was interesting: I was rather tall for it and so my left eye was obscured by the rear view mirror -- it occurred to me some months later that if the car under-steers on a right hand bend as I won't see the tree that my passenger will get a good look at. Eeek. Anyway, it was a good lesson and am interested in getting better. I think I was helped by having been driven around by my father during my childhood. I think drives well as they go. He drove Volvo estates most of the time -- I can feel Clarksonesque disapproval -- but as a passenger you learn things like what the engine sounds like when you need to change gear and what is and isn't done on the roads.

So where is this all going? Well, Rover. I am a proud Briton as they go, but even I can see when someone's weapon just isn't big enough. Italian cars are known for their speediness and good handling. French cars are know for being safe -- and apparently you need it driving around the arc d'triomphe. Japanese cars are known for their reliability and functionality. German cars are known for their excellent engineering, and the ones I have seen are beautifully engineered. The VWs I have know have always been great. I liked the one I drove. Well, all right, 3 feet in a straight line in a field doesn't count. Anyway, where does that leave Rover? What could they have done? They were doomed weren't they?

Hang on though, what about other British manufacturers - Jaguar, Aston Martin, Lotus, Noble, they do it all right. Perhaps comparisons with Lotus (now owned by Proton, who are Malaysian) and Noble are unfair, as they make super-cars. Well alright, Aston Martin make luxury Gradn Tourers. Jaguar? Possibly. Why to Jaguars still get sold then? You can't say it was all on the back of the E-type which Enzo Ferrari said was the best looking car he'd ever seen. Well, they are a brand and base themselves on an excellent ride and being stylish -- which they are. Having said that the last lot of Rovers didn't look too bad to me -- apart from those with beige interiors. But what else was there to offer? Not really enough to complete with the likes of Renault, VW, Toyota or Jaguar really.

I should just say that I am ignoring the city Rover, which was an insult really -- it was a car fabricated in South West Asia for much less than it should have been, shipped here, had a Rover badge nailed to it and the price doubled to £7k. £7k?! I'd rather have a second hand XJS thanks very much. They were also only a one star in the nCap safety tests. One car I don't want to be in!

In fairness though the Rover range as it was at the end, for their flaws, were rated as better than the last lot and had to be better than the Rovers of old when the company was staffed by strikers. Perhaps that's what really killed Rover, they were stopped them from developing at the pace of other manufacturers, so they couldn't have offered anything more. Who knows? - But even if they had been allowed to develop, what would they have offered? What would Jeremy, Richard and James be saying about them now? Whatever it was, I suspect that people might still rather be saying, if on the way out to dinner with friends, "Darling, shall we take the Aston?".